I'm going to talk about dorky fandom stuff (and fashion!) now and no one can stop me!

The fashion bit first.

Makes it less painful, hmm? So I did some Black Friday shopping for the first time in years. Had no trouble getting parking, because I deliberately parked in the boondocks and since I wasn't looking for electronics, I didn't stand in lines that wound around buildings. I went straight for the clothing stores. I've been needing jeans and other things for months, and Black Friday, despite all the insanity, does have decent clothing sales. I'll skip the part where I got an awesome $50 sweater coat for $15 and get right to the...

Supervillain fashion!

I bought a pair of knee high black boots. My shopping buddy jaimebluesq (down from Canada for the weekend) bought a pair of amazing, shiny black thigh high boots. I managed to find a tight black sweater with a fur collar and cuffs and tight, fake leather pants. And I tried the whole outfit on, shiny thigh high boots and all.

I looked like Catwoman! Or Utopia!Emma Frost (albeit with brown hair). Either way, if I ever give up teaching for a life of sexy crime, I know exactly what I'm going to wear (too bad I couldn't buy the sweater. Even at Black Friday discounts, it was $100).

The dorky fandom bit now.

Emma Frost somehow became one of my favorite characters. That wasn't supposed to happen, but it did. Now I'm just nervous they're either going to kill her or marry her off to Scott. I'd actually prefer death over marrying her to Scott, because marrying that man IS a canonical death sentence.

I need more X-Men friends on LJ... (Come out of the woodwork, I know you're there.)

I have some new friends on the list! And also...

You know how sometimes people on your friendslist post about stuff going on in their life, and all of a sudden you think "Wait a minute? Since when were they working THERE? Since when were they dating HIM/HER? Since when...?" And then you wonder how you could have missed all that seemingly pretty standard information, but somehow you feel too ashamed to ask for clarification because it seems like info you should already know? It happens to all of us sometimes.

And feel free to ask any questions!

Please copy the topics below, erase my answers and put yours in their place, and then post it in your journal! Please elaborate on the questions that would benefit from elaboration. One-Word-Answers seldom help anyone out.

( An assortment of things ostensibly about me )

I dreamed that Daken (an X-Men character for those not in the know) and I were intimately involved. I knew it was a bad idea, yet I was doing it anyway.

I dreamed that Bram Stoker's last work was a definitive guide to Mortal Kombat.

I dreamed that Wolverine and I were discussing when the movers were coming to pick up the furniture and it had to be soon, otherwise Emma would be annoyed.

Fannish dreams are so much fun, albeit in a totally cracked kind of way.

...

I have some new LJ friends! I'll put up a proper welcome post type thing shortly.

This was a really good weekend. It's great to be able to say that. It was just wonderful from start to finish, which helped take the edge off that whole "turning 30" kerfuffle.

Friday, the husband and I saw Star Wars in Concert. Anthony Daniels (the actor who played C3P0) is a charming host and I loved hearing the music live and up close. I'm mystified though as to why so many parents dragged along young children. Since when is orchestrated music, Star Wars or not, something that a child is interested in? I think to most kids, it would have been fairly boring.

I saw the Han Solo in carbonite prop up close. It's a lot smaller than I thought it would be. It seems like this massive, scary thing in the movies, but it's actually quite small and light looking. The magic of film making, yada yada yada.

Saturday, the husband and I discovered a park just a few blocks from the house. I'm not sure how we've missed it all this time, but it'll be great in the summer. I can see myself taking a book or a picnic there and just relaxing. It has a small walking track, too. That afternoon, Mike's mother and sister treated me to a wonderful Thai place for lunch and that evening, a sizable group of us went to a hibachi place for dinner. Turning 30 means free food! (At least for the weekend).

Sunday, I saw New Moon with some girlfriends. One of them couldn't stop taking phone pictures of shirtless Edward and Jacob, so I guess it's nice to know that we really always will be mentally 17.

Overall, a very good weekend. Normally I hate recap "and then I did this! and then I did this!" type posts, but I really want to remember that this was a really good birthday (especially compared to last year). I have some very good friends and some very good times with them. This is always a good thing.

SALE!

Buy my neat swag!

I'm clearing out my shelves and because I just really want this stuff out of my house, nothing is over $10. But even these prices can be bargained! Make me an offer. I'll combine shipping. I just want this stuff gone!

Everything is in gently used condition and comes from a smoke free, pet free home.

MANGA
Love Hina, vols 1-9 : $9 for the entire set

Sandman : Death : At Deaths' Door : $3

Star Wars (manga), vols 1-2, 4 : $3 for the set

COMICS
Runaways, vol 1 : $3

Buffy the Vampire Slayer : The Origin : $2

ARTBOOKS (all in Japanese)

Sailor Moon : $8
This book is full of gorgeous, full color drawings and paintings by Naoko Takeuchi. The book itself is hardcover, with two foldout, double sided posters.

Sailor Moon S : $5
An extensive guide to the third season, with tons of pictures, write ups, sketches, creator's notes, scripts, etc. Even if you can't read Japanese, the pictures alone are worth it. Contains a weird Sailor Moon toys section.

Ranma 1/2 : $5
Lots of full color paintings and drawings, with series highlights from the manga as well.

Rurouni Kenshin : $5
Contains artwork from the anime series and the OAV.

DOUJINSHI
All 5 of them for $5.
Troublemaker : a Rurouni Kenshin parody
Doki Doki : Rurouni Kenshin, Enishi/Kaoru pairing. Beautifully drawn.
Heart's Effect : Rurouni Kenshin, Enishi/Kaoru pairing
Ayanami de Pon! : a completely cracked out Evangelion parody
Personal : a strange Final Fantasy VII/Pokemon parody. Indeed.

ANIME
Hellsing TV series, vols 1-4 (entire set) : $8

Make me an offer! Seriously! I want this stuff gone!

Dealing with stressful crap makes me not want to update. However, I want to make a better commitment to updating, because posting once a week is lame.

I'm beginning a house decluttering project. Now, I don't have a very cluttered house to begin with, but there are books and clothes and just things that could stand to be cleared out. There's a chance we will be moving this summer and I want to make the packing process that much easier. And if we don't move, I want the stuff out of my house anyway.

If I clear out books, DVDS, etc, I'm post them up here for people to take a look at. One woman's annoying cluttermess is another person's... whatever you'd like it to be.

Last night I dreamed that someone jacked my car, stole all the parts AND my 1997 Star Wars : Special Edition CDs.

I was upset about the car, but figured I could force the insurance company to pay for it. I was way more upset about the CDs. Special Editions, man, with the fancy covers and the full color booklets and everything! Plus, back in the day, I had to save up money to buy those.

So... geek dreams?

Tell us how you really feel, Obi-Wan...

Advice that I gave to a friend (edited a bit), that I ought to read every morning I doubt myself, my goals or my black sheep status in my family.

...

People change their careers, their plans, their goals, people change their lives all throughout their lives. Nothing you do now is going to set you in stone for the rest of your life.

And here's the most important part, so listen up. You do what makes you happy, what makes you content, what makes you want to get up in the morning and face the day. Everything else is a waste of your time. If your plans have changed, that's just part of maturing and learning more about yourself. It doesn't mean you fucked up. Don't force yourself into following your original plans and onward if it doesn't feel meaningful or interesting anymore. It won't be worth it. Do what you feel good about.

...

Every single time I'm questioned about not following the Life Script, I should come back and read this.

Mike and I have been married for a year.

A year! Really? Where does the time go? This weekend, we celebrated both our first and our seventh anniversary. Our first year of marriage and seven years of being together. We keep joking about getting the so-called seven year itch, but you know, if we haven't felt the need to scratch this far, I doubt we ever will.

We spent the weekend at a nice hotel near where we got married. Kearny High School's class of 1979 was also in attendance for their 30th reunion; these people apparently really love to have reunions. They have one every five years. As we stood in the check-in line, we heard one guy enthusiastically tell someone else that he just loves these reunions, as it's the only chance he has in the world to be himself with other people who are exactly like him.

Yeah. Wow. Anyway.

That evening, we went to the Salt Creek Grille, where we had our wedding reception. It's so nice to get dressed up for a formal evening. The manager, who was absolutely amazing in putting our reception together, made sure we had a seat right by the river view and she comped us a bottle of good champagne. Dinner was wonderful. We were entirely defeated by the chocolate heaven of a dessert, which they prepared at our table, with melted chocolate ganache and real whipped cream. I wish I had some now. We took the rest of the champagne back to the hotel with us and decadently finished it off while laying in bed.

It was romantic and sweet and I couldn't stop smiling most of the evening. I love you, honey. I love you so much.

Food and I are just batting 1000 today. In fact, I'm probably just not meant to attempt to eat anything for the rest of the day.

I indulged in Chinese food for lunch, which I so rarely do. Within two bites, the red sauce dribbled onto my desk and then further dripped into my keyboard and slid in between the keys (I was trying to finish up a paper while eating). It took me long enough to clean it out that I only ate half the lunch after that.

I decided to have an apple for dessert, bit into it and it promptly SPRAYED all over my monitor. What sort of apple sprays? The surprise was enough that I dropped the apple, it rolled over my desk, onto my keyboard and then rolled across the floor. I ended up throwing the stupid thing away.

An hour later, after victoriously finishing a paper whose topic was both frustrating and kind of boring, I made a cup of peppermint tea to settle my stomach. While pouring the tea, the tea towel got caught on one of the stove burners, which caused me to pour water all over the counter.

Also? When I set the remainder of the red sauce on the counter, the lid promptly flipped open and splattered globules across the counter top.

I give up. I just not meant to eat anything today.

Back in high school, I seriously considered joining the Peace Corps. I ended up going to the Netherlands for six months instead and then when I went to college, I forgot about the idea for a while. But it's back in my head again. I've been looking at the Peace Corps website, looking at a few other things. Education jobs are in high demand in most postings, and once I'm done with my Master's and Mike has his full certification in math, we might be a good match.

It's an idea. It's not fully formed yet, but it's there, brewing. Percolating.

I don't want to be here anymore. I love my family. I love my friends. I don't love the idea of a life of stifling mediocrity. I don't buy into the "American dream" and never have. I have no problem with people who do - everyone has to make the choices that are best for them - but it's just not for me. A mortgage and a car loan and a comfy 9-5 office job sound like a prison sentence. It's, at the very least, not even vaguely what I want out of my life.

This is not the first time I've talked about long term volunteering for an NGO. I can look back at older journal entries and read the same ideas. It comes up periodically. I spent six months seeing a lot of Western Europe and then two years seeing parts of Asia, and the idea that I can be out there, doing something different, something meaningful, has never left me.

It gnaws at me.

This video never fails to cheer me up! I think it's the peppy voice saying "fuck you very much" that does the trick. And all the happy people.

You know what I don't have? Time to be sick. I have so much crap I have to get done right the hell now, so I don't have time to be this run down and achy and pain-filled. Dammit, I'm taking four lit classes, each with major freakin' projects, I'm researching a thesis paper, I have the GRE to study for, grad school essays to write, and a flake of a professor to track down in Germany so she can write one of my damn recommendation letters. Oh, and right now, I have a powerpoint on the Harlem Renaissance to put together, and I haven't even started the research on that gem.

I don't have time for this crap.

This semester's already eating me alive, hence the Twitteresque nature of my posts lately. I'd like to make a real entry (and buy a vowel?), but I'd need a significant amount of time to both a) get my thoughts in some semblance of order and b) not feel guilty because I'm vegging out and making LJ posts.

Soon, my little crunchberries. Soon.

Where did everybody go?!

I REFUSE TO ACKNOWLEDGE THAT THE WEATHER HAS COOLED DOWN.

I'm putting on a sundress! It's on right now! It has big, splashy green flowers and a red and black and white (and some yellow) pattern and I bought it in Cape Cod and... and... it's ankle length and bright and colorful and tropical.

It is a lovely dress and I only got to wear it once so far. Well, now I'm wearing it for a second time, cooler weather be damned. Because it's not cool. It's only September 3rd, dammit, the weather is not allowed to cool down yet.

I WILL NOT BE STOPPED!

It already feels like fall today. And off I go back to school.

How appropriate.

Today I have Development of the Novel and Thematic Studies, which is the thesis class. I have a three hour break in between the two, part of which will be used to harass the financial aid office. Why, it feels just like undergrad Round One!

Except that I started undergrad Round One ten years ago. Ten years ago. I'm fine with high school being some time ago, but knowing that I started freshman year of college ten freakin' years ago makes me feel old. I associate high school with youth and silliness, but college... well, there was silliness there too, but the memories are still so fresh and close that's it's hard to believe I started at the 'Po ten years ago.

I'll type it again to really slam it home : ten frakkin' years ago.

I can even remember what I wore on the first day. I was still in my Gap phase (I know, horribly embarrassing and not ME at all) and so I was all preppied out with my khaki skirt (for the love of...) and my crisp, white shirt and my SOFT BLUE ZIP UP VEST (they were in style, kindly shut up). Heh. I had a really cute haircut to go with it. Thankfully, the Gap phase lasted all of two years and it was pretty much a backlash against my weird, semi-Goth phase in high school. The soft blue vest was made of some kind of... sweatshirt material, so it wasn't a completely awful, early 90s vest, but still. I remember I looked pretty damn good, actually, but me + preppy = no.

How I digress.

Damn. Ten years ago. That doesn't even seem possible. My very first class was an 8:00 AM English class. I met a guy there (who is getting married this weekend!) that was a pretty good friend throughout all of college. And this was ten damn years ago.

Shoot.

Damn, I'm becoming a crotchety old lady.

First, there was the teenager in the bookstore. We were both sitting there quietly, each flipping through one book or another. Then she makes a call on her cell and for the next five minutes, I get to hear EVERYTHING about her tenth grade schedule, down to which teacher is the easiest and which French class she'd prefer and even that "I wanted you to take that class with meeee, oh please, oh please, oh pleeeease!" Everything, loudly, while she sits feet away from me, squealing.

I put up with it for five minutes, thinking that surely she'd remember she's in a bookstore and that entire world does not want nor care to hear about the minutiae of sophomore year. But like the Energizer bunny, she kept going and going and going -

I slammed the book shut. "Do you really think I want to hear every last detail of your conversation?!"

She looked at me in shock for a moment, then jumped up as if burned, gathering her bags and practically falling over herself. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry!" She ran away.

Second, I was sitting on the floor in the library (all of my old lady moments happen among books, apparently), flipping through a guilty pleasure (okay, X-Men), another comic on the floor right next to me and my handbag.

Teenage boys RUNS up next to me, reaches down and snatches the comic away. "Yeah, I want that!"

I snatched it right back. "No, no, no. You can't have it."

He looked at me as if the very concept was shocking. "Oh. You're right. I'm sorry." And he ran back the way he came.

Damn kids these days.

FIRST
Praxis results are in. I scored 195 over 200, which puts me in the top 15% of the state and earned me a shiny certificate saying so. This was for the English language, literature and composition exam.

This feels great, especially since my hand was shaking in the last half hour of the exam and I left not feeling spectacular about it. Hopefully this will also offset what I know won't be magnificent GRE scores (in the math, anyway). Still aiming for my top grad school...

SECOND
I'm back from a relaxing week in Cape Cod, which is why I haven't posted in over 10 days. We got pretty lucky; the weather was gorgeous all week long, leading to some very beautiful beach days. We rented a cozy little cottage ten minutes' walk from the beach on Nantucket Sound. I am completely spoiled on renting houses now for vacation; why stay in a cramped little hotel room when I can rent a whole house, BBQ dinner most nights and enjoy it on a private porch with a yard? It saves a lot of money and it's so much more relaxing. Of course, we had a few seafood dinners out, but the whole setup just made for such a mellow stay.

We also did a day trip out to Provincetown, which boasts an incredibly culture of gay friendliness and love. So many transgendered Little Bo Beeps. Tons of cool clothing and jewelry shops and art galleries and quirky little places. Beautiful, relaxing beach too. I'd love to spend a long weekend out there. I spent way more than I should've on Indian wrap skirts and other clothing and jewelry, but it's stuff I'll wear for a while to come.

I'm already considering options for my next mellow vacation.

( Harry Potter movie! Late to the party! Big ole' review! )